Tag Archives: shit

Shit PanCakes


Starting this post from a tweet I tweeted

(you didn’t see it, that’s your fault, VonElleBeeStine),

” grumble grumble… Damn car.. Damn snow.. Coffee heartburn..

Frozenredhurtyfeets..Today is lame, I move that it be stricken from memory.”

And then I struck it from memory.
Thus the problem with writing this post, what the fuck was today?

Oh, yeah.. The car, the just fixed car, stopped being fixed.

It snowed a bunch, which is so freaking lame.

I hate snow.
Rain, I love rain, not snow.

Snow sticks around, it becomes mush-ice-yuck, it makes me have to wear shoes, its cold, it freezes things

(see: Fuck You, Jack Frost),

and it makes me get up earlier, which since there is not morning, makes my mind all freaky-out-ish!

Oh, huh..
Oh yeah, back to today.

Plus, I was so excited to get a Giauge (Giant+Huge) cup of coffee on this early-ish-on-my-way-to-school,

time of day, for said Coffee, to end up luke warm.

Eh… I figured I will still drink it, it got luke warm because

I was to involved with my werewolf, and I love coffee, so I couldn’t just throw it out

(see: Coffee!).

Then broken car happens, coffee gets really cold, fucking snow,

in and out of broken car, walking to wait for my Super Grandpa to save me, feets little frozen blocks.

 

Like this, but EVERYWHERE!

I still drink coffee to keep from crying, then coffee turned on me.

Coffee enraged heartburn.
Not cool coffee, not cool..
I still have said heartburn and it makes me sad, that my friend and love would be so cruel.
So, I struck today from today and that was that.

I also had to go to the food market, I drug the Jake along,

because he hates it but he really likes it, plus he’s funny.

 

Really?!

He wanted these stupid applesauce in a to-go tube thing-y,

I told him that it wasn’t worth it, but he was all pouty jakey eyes and so he got the damn applesauce.

I got revenge.

All fifteen minutes worth of the drive home,

I told him how he could have got 128oz of applesauce for the same price as the 30oz we bought.
Then he said, “MMMMMOOOOOOMMMM” and I said,

“Hey someday you will be at the store and you will need applesauce.

You will remember what I said and by the better deal, then you will have money left over for Cheeseburgers,

wouldn’t you rather have cheese burgers and applesauce then just applesauce.”

Then I continued on this tangent tell we got home,

where I told him he was lucky to have me as a mom,

most moms would not teach their kids about applesauce prices and pretty much free cheeseburgers,

just for being smart.

I do win mother of the year, and I didn’t even have to shit pancakes.

In your face other mothers!